Chapter 226 Chapter 226 Selective Amnesia (Bonus Chapter For Sakura Ran ③)
Chapter 226 Selective Amnesia (Bonus Chapter For Sakura Ran ③)
While this reality might be cruel for Su Tao, Dr. Lin felt compelled to speak. Si Chen's idea was correct; Su Tao had to confront this process directly to gain the courage needed to face Chi Xiaocheng's distorted memories. The one who tied the bell must untie it. If Su Tao dared not face it, then recovering her memories would become exceedingly difficult.
Dr. Lin continued, "Actually, we can view Miss Chi's memories before and after she woke up as a game. Miss Chi is the romanceable heroine, and Miss Su Tao is the protagonist."
"Before Miss Chi's feigned death, there was no doubt her favorability towards Miss Su Tao was very high. Even if not at the maximum value I just mentioned, it would have been around eighty or ninety, given she was willing to die for you."
"However, perhaps due to her injuries, during her period of unconsciousness, Miss Chi couldn't accept her own death, the reality of having left you forever. It's possible that when her consciousness briefly stirred, her recollections concerning you were predominantly those of pain."
Dr. Lin's words were difficult for Su Tao to accept. She urgently interrupted him, "Why only pain? Clearly, in the end... when I thought Xiaocheng was truly going to die..."
"Xiaocheng said she was very happy at that moment, because I was safe, and she had protected me."
"Although I became withdrawn and hesitant for a long time afterward, and made many mistakes, when she was shot, she was happy!"
"And even before that, aside from a few unpleasant incidents, Xiaocheng and I shared many happy and joyful moments together!"
Her soft, beautiful hair was slightly disheveled. She usually wore a chic and elegant high ponytail, but lacking the mood to style her hair, she had simply gathered it into a messy single ponytail with a hair tie. While her inherent beauty was still evident, her ethereal purity and overall demeanor lacked a certain striking brilliance. Her agitation was clear for all to see.
Dr. Lin composed himself and said, "In psychology, humans are inherently wired to seek meaning in life. Recalling beautiful moments can reinforce the belief that 'my life is valuable,' thereby alleviating the fear and pain experienced at the end of life."
"'Furthermore, there's the instinctive pursuit of "love" and "belonging," humanity's deep-seated need for affiliation. This is merely the most superficial aspect. Even if, hypothetically, Miss Chi genuinely disliked you, when she was truly on the verge of death—'"
"'—as long as she cared about you, she would undoubtedly recall beautiful things. She wouldn't want to depart with resentment. The so-called "life flashing before one's eyes" is the same concept.'"
"'As for why she recalled painful rather than beautiful things, the most fundamental reason is likely that the good memories, for her, paled in comparison to the agony she experienced then.'"
The words were laden with a somber truth, completely draining Su Tao of her strength. She sank onto the chair with a thud, Dr. Lin's final words echoing through her mind.
Painful memories outweighed the beautiful ones.
Reflecting on the past few months, hadn't it been exactly like that?
Xiaocheng had pursued her, confessed her feelings, and then been hurt because of her, giving rise to all sorts of negative emotions.
And what was the response she had received in return?
It was avoidance, fear, rejection. Even on her deathbed, she hadn't received the answer she longed for.
Could that truly still be called happiness?
Those happy smiles she displayed every day, were they genuinely joyful, or merely a strained performance to prevent her from worrying?
Su Tao gradually found herself unable to comprehend, yet she somewhat grasped Dr. Lin's final remark. There was a clear trail to follow. Regardless of the beginning or the outcome, the fundamental cause lay with Su Tao herself!
Everyone looked at Su Tao, waiting for the young woman to regain her composure.
Dr. Lin quietly asked, "Shall I continue?"
Su Tao took a deep breath, a flicker of weariness entering her eyes. "Dr. Lin, please continue."
Dr. Lin nodded. "The most significant change lies in the favorability aspect, followed by the various memories that were filled in."
"'Based on what Dr. Chen and I have learned about her life, we've tentatively concluded that in her memories from these past few months, Miss Su Tao's presence is quite strong, yet she appears very infrequently.'"
"'More often, it is through the character of Ye Liang that the fragmented memories of both sides are linked together.'"
"'Furthermore, Miss Chi's concern for Miss Su Tao previously hasn't actually changed. Considering her past experiences, this means that even if Miss Chi quarreled with Miss Su Tao, she never truly disliked her.'"
Upon hearing this, a spark of light suddenly flickered in Su Tao's tired eyes. "She didn't dislike me?"
Dongfang Yang chimed in, "But Su Tao said that in the hospital room, Chi Xiaocheng explicitly stated she didn't like her, didn't she?"
Dr. Lin replied, "When having a spat, especially as a relationship deteriorates, one certainly wouldn't say anything affectionate, would they?"
At his words, Su Tao suddenly recalled that Chi Xiaocheng hadn't been so cold at first. She would even call her Sister Su Tao.
When did the change begin? Was it when she began talking to herself about things that seemed very strange to Su Tao? Or was it the confession?
But no matter what, her "dislike" was absolutely not "hatred"!
Su Tao's voice was firm. "Dr. Lin, please continue!"
Dr. Lin nodded. "Let me first directly recount what might have occurred in her memories."
"'The timeline should start after the high school argument and extend into college, where Miss Su Tao, your relationship with Ye Liang grew increasingly close. You alienated Miss Chi because of Ye Liang, attended his parties, and consistently reprimanded Miss Chi on his behalf.'"
"'In her perception, you were in a state where "Ye Liang > Xiaocheng." Miss Chi persistently clung to you, wanting to win you back, but you found her increasingly irritating and considered her to be making unreasonable demands.'"
"'Furthermore, the two of you never had an open conversation. You were always preoccupied with various matters and neglected her, eventually even severing your relationship.'"
Dr. Lin added, "Naturally, that last point—severing ties—is a deduction Dr. Chen and I made. It's unclear if the situation actually escalated to that degree."
"'The ultimate catalyst for the change likely occurred when Ye Liang, in a fit of anger, attempted to kill Miss Chi. She narrowly escaped and sought your support and assistance as an elder sister, but you continued to side with Ye Liang, even giving her a disapproving look.'"
"'—In her memories, you had completely become someone who disliked her.'"
Dr. Lin spoke, then looked at Dongfang Yang and Si Chen. "Conversely, some details related to Miss Su Tao were removed from the young masters' memories, replaced instead with them as two older brother figures who stood by her side."
Dr. Lin took a deep breath. "Miss Chi's condition can also be defined as selective amnesia; she forgot the painful experiences. Her brain, in response to these memory gaps, automatically filled them in."
Word after word, they seared themselves into Su Tao's mind. She simply had a faint feeling that Dr. Lin's words sounded familiar.
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